Hey y’all!

If you’re reading this then I’m sure you’re aware that Drake’s album, Scorpion, came out on June 29th. ( I tried so hard to make an “if you’re reading this it’s too late” joke right there but I just couldn’t make it work). I was going to write a full review of the album since it’s all the buzz right now, but I didn’t think anyone would truly want to sit here and read what I thought about all 25 songs and I didn’t really want to write that. Instead, I present to you a list of captions from the album perfect for any Instagram occasion. After all, Drake lyrics and Instagram captions go together like mac and cheese.

For when your whole squad looks good (even the one person who usually can’t keep their eyes open):

“The only ones I want to tell are the ones I can call”- Emotionless

“Saturday, call the girls, get ‘em gassed up”- Nice For What

For when you’re living your best life on vacation:

“Only lying I do is out in the tropics”- Is There More

“Vacay to a place where you could take pictures to post on insta”- That’s How You Feel

“Trips to wherever feels right”- Don’t Matter to Me

For when you’re feeling a little petty but still keeping your cool:

“Yeah I am what I am, I ain’t got no time for misunderstandings again”- Nonstop

“Got em all bitter”- Nonstop

“I’ve never been one to make amends” – 8 Out Of 10

“Its too late for all that lovey dovey shit”- Mob Ties

For your “candid” laughing pics:

Only cryin’ I do is cryin’ from laughin’ ’bout it”- Is There More

“How you even managin’ to keep straight faces”- Jaded

For when you’re feeling brutally honest about your habits:

“I always need a glass of wine by sundown”- Final Fantasy

“She had an attitude in the summer but she’s being nice again”- Blue Tint

“Don’t pull up at 6 AM to cuddle with me”- God’s Plan

“I can’t even lie, I’d rather stay inside”- Finesse

For when you’re celebrating your birthday:

Pretty much the entirety of “Ratchet Happy Birthday”.

For when you’re feeling ~summer vibes~:

“Get the vibe right, get your mind right”- After Dark

“Work all winter, shine all summer”- That’s How You Feel

“How can you be angry on a night in July?”- Summer Games

“Summer Games”- Summer Games

“Yachts on the 4th of July”- Is There More

For when you’re feeling #blessed:

“Had a moment but it came and went”- Nonstop

“Either hand is an upper hand”- Nonstop

“There’s no way this is real man, it can’t be”

“There’s no way this is real man, it can’t be”- Elevate

“I wanna thank God for workin’ way harder than Satan”- Elevate

For when you’re an independent woman and killin’ it:

“Had a man last year, life goes on”- Nice For What

“Pinky ring til I get a wedding ring”- Nonstop

“I stay busy working on me”- Elevate

“Still I rise, Maya Angelou vibes”- Talk Up

“I found my peace, I’m about to say my piece”- Peak

“Don’t have me wastin my time”- Summer Games

“But the new me is really still the real me”- In My Feelings

For when you’re just straight up feeling yourself:

“Stopped askin’ myself and I started feelin’ myself”- Survival

“My Mount Rushmore is me with four different expressions”- Survival

“I’m the chosen one. Flowers never pick themselves”- Sandra’s Rose

“Said you want a simple life and that’s not me”- Summer Games

“And you showin’ off, but it’s alright. It’s a short life”- Nice For What

For when you’re from Louisville and are just taking what you can get at this point:

“Louisville hush money for my young gunners”- Sandra’s Rose

“Rick Pitino, I take ’em to strip clubs and casinos”- Sandra’s Rose

Since you’ve made it to the end, here’s a pic of me from my college makeup class when I accidentally ended up looking like the Walmart version of Drake. Happy Insta-ing!